Mid Life Crisis??

 

What do you do when at the ripe old age of thirty seven, you suddenly develop feelings of confusion about the decisions that you have made in your life?? When you develop cravings, of wanting to do so many things, which in your twenties, you believed that there was enough time to do, but now, realize that you don’t. Have. That . Much. Time. After. All. When you realize that you had not bargained that the amount of time you spent in setting up a cozy home, bringing up kids and settling into your career would slowly, imperceptibly, chip away from the huge block of time, that you took for granted. Where you had planned for a grander scheme of things.

When I read things on facebook which say “Instead of wondering when your next vacation is, probably you should set up a life that you do not need escaping from!” and put this under the heading of “Inspirational quotes”, I want to literally throw something at them!

Nowadays,I seem to be always wanting to escape and do something else. I crave for Saturdays so I can fantasize about Sundays. I crave vacations. I crave for quiet time with my book exactly at the same time when my daughter turns on her needy voice. I crave for work when there is less, and crave for time to laze when there is too much work. Basically, I seem to be in ‘always wanting to escape from here mode’!My normality comes from thinking that this feeling of wanting to do something else and something more, all the time, is what everyone feels and hence, also comes under the heading of what normal should be.

If that sounds strange and funny, coming from a psychiatrist,so be it. I idle browsed  the ever helpful google and found a name for it. Mid life crisis. Assuming that I will die at 74, its just about the right time to develop one. Thank you google, for making me a part of a big cult of people who are, to put it simply, confused. And trying to find some way out of it!

And so, I decided that when in confusion, the best way out was full scale inertia. From hopping from one task to another maniacally, I went to vegetate mode. Not completely. But just doing the basic amount of work that I need to do, and then exist. Hence, the lack of blog posts. Because I am willing myself to slowly clear the confusion that exists in my mind. So much confusions that I was even finding myself making to do lists in my dreams!

Till inspiration finds me, or me it,  my grand plan to stay sane,is to wake up, work and just be. And if some important work comes in between, just do it. Or a summer coming up, just plan a vacation and be done with it. Or if there is a request for a talk, just take it. Or a blog post brimming up into my conscious, just write it. A recipe waiting to be tried, just cook it. A lovely unputdownable book, just read it. Some fun time with the kids, just have it. A new hobby, just try it. An interesting case, just discuss it….Aaagrhhh..I’m back to square one!!

 

 

 

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6 thoughts on “Mid Life Crisis??

  1. Parul Thakur March 12, 2016 / 5:08 pm

    When I was a kid or let’s say I was growing up. I read a quote that said “As you as you feel too old to do something, do it”. So, what you are feeling right now is what I feel all the time. It’s just that I keep on going so that at 47, when I look back I know I am still travelling, blogging, sleeping as much as i want or whatever. 🙂
    You relax – take each day as it comes and do what that day wants you to in terms of your choices. It will work 🙂

    Like

    • preethishanbhag March 14, 2016 / 6:53 am

      Thanks Parul. It’s been a while that this is happening, so was frustrated. Let’s hope the fog clears asap:)

      Liked by 1 person

  2. fabfortee March 13, 2016 / 2:49 pm

    Hmmmmm …… Rings a bell, except that now 37 seems so young and so many light years ago:) Enjoy…. Life will truly kick start at 40

    Like

  3. Jean March 17, 2016 / 1:10 am

    I think you are in a very busy phase of life where your children require your attention. Hopefully hubby helps out.

    I wish I didn’t have to wait a few more years before I’m eligible to retire. Sigh. Anyway. You see my partner took early retirement awhile ago and pursued his personal interests. Now he has a contract paid job that is consuming him until this fall! It’s an extension of his volunteer interests.

    He is father of 2 adult children from previous marriage. So he’s done with that part except a parent is sometimes still a parent..he also does online book keeping for son’s little store. Loves watching business grow and giving business advice. (He has a MBA.)

    Just to let you know I will be reminding you a few days before your post gets published ..hopefully in May. 🙂

    Like

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